According to Tom Ehrich, these three are the biggest threats to marriage. Not gays, feminists, contraceptives, or other conservative boogeymen and scapegoats of the past half century. I tend to agree. We married couples can be our own worst enemies when it comes to the overall perception of our shared life. I'm disinclined--seriously so--to blame somebody else for the obstacles I can't overcome, or that I transcend only with difficulty.